Deflecting the Blame???

Posted: July 22, 2016 in World On The Edge

this_is_my_lifeWhen others give us advice we don’t like, we’re sometimes quick to say, “This is my life!” Meaning I’m responsible for myself.

But . . .

How many of us blame others rather than ourselves when things go wrong with our life? When we do that, we’re not taking responsibility for ourselves; we’re saying something like you should have done something to keep it from happening—you should have been responsible for my life, then this wouldn’t have happened to me.

Making our own mistakes the fault of others is not only whiny, it shows a lack of integrity, dishonesty, and possibly a narcissistic personality.

Narcissists are notorious for placing blame on other people and not on themselves. Even when they clearly and definitely did something wrong, they cannot- and will not- accept responsibility. They almost always deflect the blame elsewhere. Narcissists either ignore their contribution to the situation or insist that the other person (spouse, child, co-worker or etc.) made them do it. Narcissists know right from wrong, they just cannot allow something bad to be their fault. It is another manifestation of their supreme self-centeredness as well as a protection for their fragile ego. It is also a primitive method of avoiding external repercussions.–Alexander Burgemeester

There’s another way to look at the statement, This is my life, and that is with gratitude for it, and a desire to polish it to the shine that God intends it to have.


Be honest with ourselves. Take a good look in the mirror and–just be honest. No whining, no blaming others for what is our responsibility.

Own what we’ve done. Love others as well as ourselves. Create a space of empathy for others, not demand of others. Don’t listen to bad-mouthing from someone set on bringing you down. And finally, to see my life as good, important, valuable, and interwoven in Almighty God’s plan.


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