Translating a World on the Edge

Life is wonderful when we celebrate it with our families. What would we do without their support?

On Friday of Labor Day weekend, I left for the Atlanta Journal Constitution’s Decatur Book Festival, taking my novel and Tuscany’s short Story Collection to present at the Emerging Writer’s Pavilion. I’d never have gotten there without my husband. Driving around Atlanta for someone who doesn’t live there is ominous. Who could do it without a GPS? But George, the driver, the leader, always the strong one, got us there easily. We found our motel and we found the festival as if we were Atlanta natives.

The festival itself was amazing. Downtown Decatur is the perfect venue for the thousands—-yes thousands—-who were there. What was most impressive were the droves of families, with strollers and dogs in tow, who came on that very hot, humid weekend. My family was among them.

Two of my daughters, their husbands and children, live in Atlanta; my middle daughter, Sheila, her husband Matt and their three boys, Daniel, Anthony and Matthew; and my youngest daughter, Anne Marie, her husband, Pat, and my namesake, Caroline Kaye. All of them came to support me, and I can’t say how much it meant.

And there were others who came: Mia, a friend and photographer who showed up unexpectedly and snapped picture after picture of me during my talk and at my book-signing. And my cousins, Jim and Janet who came from Jonesboro with smiles and good wishes. I appreciate all of them so much.

On Sunday when the festival was over, we went to Sheila’s house for a cookout. (Yes, it was raining again, but that did not spoil it in the least) We were met at the door with a Welcome Poster drawn by Daniel and Anthony—first and second graders at Atlanta’s Christ the King School. I have to brag a bit and say that Daniel is a second grade Student Council Representative. The boys had also decorated the table with yellow cut-out stars and purple tissue-paper roses, and Anthony had made paper flowers for a vase in the center.

Anne Marie made wonderful Kentucky Bourbon squares and Pat made a Cream Cheese and Chili dip that lasted only about fifteen minutes. Matt cooked hot dogs and hamburgers and Sheila’s baked beans were mouth-watering.

So we celebrated. We celebrated family. We celebrated each other with laughter, with lots of hugs and sloppy, kid-kisses, and with love.

When we left, Matt dug from his herb garden and sent us home with lemon thyme, mint, and oregano to plant. Anthony sent us home with a flower from the vase he’d made. And Matthew sent us home with–a cold. God love him.

God love them all.  What a celebration!

When was the last time I argued with a spouse, child, friend, or business associate? What tactics did I use? Were they strong-armed with a my-way-or-the-highway feel?

When we argue—and all of us do at one time or another—our goal is often to break the spirit of our opponent with relentless words until he/she gives in. We use the bit and bridle, the saddle and spurs technique to control him or her. Mostly, because we want to get it over with quick, or we just want to vent. Venting is not arguing.

Attempting to break the spirit causes a lack of ongoing trust, and sometimes even fear. It can destroy the connection or bond we might have had with the person, when what we’re really after is that bond or connection. (more…)

Freedom is a big word. A weighty word. A lengthy word. The locomotive of Freedom is championed by words, like Liberty and Independence. But the locomotive’s steam is often the lack of any restriction or inhibition.

The train of Freedom runs two ways, and on conflicting tracks. One is a track of lies, the other a track of truth.

Before you buy a ticket on one train or the other, there are questions to ask: Where does it come from? Where is it going? And most especially, who is its engineer?

The lying train of Freedom can be very long and black. It can come from jumbled and defective thinking. It can take us to foolishness and death. And its engineer can be a faulty entity of propaganda.

Do we really have the freedom to kill innocent babies? The engineers of society and our government say we can.

Do we honestly have the freedom to forget our marriage vow, or steal another person’s wife or husband, or to have sex with whomever we want? The engineers of Hollywood say we can.

Do we truthfully have the freedom to knock ourselves out with dope at the expense of the life of our family and our own life as well? The enormous drug trade says we can.

Who is your engineer? Who is driving your Freedom train? We do have a choice. On which train will you buy a ticket?

For you were called for freedom, brothers and sisters.
But do not use this freedom as an opportunity for the flesh;
rather, serve one another through love. For the whole law is fulfilled in one statement, namely, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. But if you go on biting and devouring one another, beware that you are not consumed by one another.– Gal 5:1 13-18

We often use this phrase today: “She (or He) is needy,” meaning insecure enough to ‘need’ an overabundance of attention from another human being.

It’s difficult to interact with people who have learned from negative experience not to trust. If you ignore or avoid them, they will be hurt by your rejection, and may get frantic, desperate or spiteful.

Clingy behavior puts a strain on any relationship. We don’t want to suffocate another with our insecurities, but the fact is each of us needs to be needed. Can you imagine what it would be like if nobody needed you? (more…)